I could really use some happy thought’s right now.. Boyfriends kidney transplant is officially on the 16th of this month… that’s next week. I have to fly there on Christmas week… that means I need to send my visa application out tomorrow and get it sent to me priority. I’m so worried I feel just sick. And because of border patrol in the UK denying me entry lat time I have to take this extra step to make sure I get in. I’m so tight for money right now I wonder if they will turn me back if I go without a visa…  I’m a born and raised American!!!! Honestly why they gave me such a hassle I don’t know… I don’t want to stay in that stupid miserable country anyway… I just need to take care of Mike. I don’t know what to do…. My head is a mess.